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The MBoard  |  Non-MegaMan  |  Any Other Business?  |  : Omegle - chat with a stranger anonymously
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Author Topic: Omegle - chat with a stranger anonymously  (Read 6244 times)
ASR
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 10911



« on: 4 April 2009, 20:57:51 »

Omegle.com

On this site, you get connected to a random stranger and just get to chat.

It's really fun, and gave me a lot of hilarious results.

I'll post the appropriate ones:

: Rap Time
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Okay, rap battle!
You: Go!
You: You start!
You: With the rapping!
Stranger: ya dig
You: say whaaaaaaaa
Stranger: backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack backpack
You: I like what you did there with that word.
Stranger: yo mama so fat even dora cant explore her
Stranger: yo
You: You are the next Shakespeare.
You: Just wanted to let you know.
You: I am severely impressed.
Stranger: i know
Stranger: i get that alot
You: So when's the baby due?
You: BECAUSE YOU'RE PREGNANT WITH RHYMES
Stranger: june
You: Oh, really? Do you know if it's a boy or a girl yet?
You: BECAUSE YOUR RHYMES ARE GENDERLESS
Stranger: boy
Stranger: wat up homie ?
Stranger: no homo
You: Aw, no homo?
You have disconnected.

: Pool Boy
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hola
You: Hi. I'm the new pool boy.
Stranger: kiss my ass
You: Oh, really, Mrs. Teatherbaum?
You: I feel like... this is innappropriate!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

: Text Adventure
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You wake up alone in a cold, empty room.
Stranger: no?
You: There is a stack of magazines in the corner.
You: It is dark, but the light switch is within your reach.
Stranger: wtf is wrong with you
You: I don't know that command.
Stranger: ##### you
You: I don't know that command.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

: I Love Chocolate
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: I love chocolate
You: #####ing RUN AWAY.
You: He's RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
You: Okay, seriously, if you don't move RIGHT NOW.
You: You are SO DEAD.
Stranger: I'm already dead
You: and that is my impression of a black guy watching a horror movie
You: what are your thoughts, what can i improve
Stranger: I love chocolate
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

: Text Adventure 2
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: can you speak french fluently?
You: You wake up alone in a cold, dark room.
Stranger: et ...
You: There is a dog in the corner, staring at you.
You: A door is to your south.
Stranger: and
You: And no, I cannot speak French fluently.
Stranger: go on
Stranger: your story intrigues me
You: You have died from intrigue/dissentary!
You have disconnected.

I had a lot more but these are the only ones I can post here.
Logged

Vinchenz Rock
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 3642



« Reply #1 on: 4 April 2009, 21:09:05 »

I had some fun.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: brazil?
You: Herro.
You: Non
Stranger: ufff ...good
Stranger: where are you from?
You:
Ich komme aus Italien.
Stranger: ooo deutsch :D sehr gut
Stranger: und ich aus polen
You:
Schön.
Stranger: wie alt bist du?
Stranger: ich bin 16
You: 18 Jahre alt
Stranger: wie lange lernst du deutsch?
You: Mai, mi ha parlato in italiano.
Stranger: i dont can italiano
You: Adesso devo andare salvare il mondo.
Stranger: a może porozmawiamy po polsku cwaniaczku?
You:
バイバイ、皆さん。
You have disconnected.
Logged

Lunchebox
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 1235



« Reply #2 on: 4 April 2009, 22:49:58 »

ASR, those were all lame.

I expected something much funnier from you.
Logged
ASR
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 10911



« Reply #3 on: 4 April 2009, 23:09:31 »

Ah, shush, they're funny enough. The pool boy one and the text adventure ones I was proud of.
Logged

Johncarllos
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*****
Posts: 6806



« Reply #4 on: 4 April 2009, 23:13:37 »

I like using the Bot for AIM.
Lots of fun.
Logged

I can skin anything smaller than a bobcat in 30 seconds.
Lunchebox
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 1235



« Reply #5 on: 5 April 2009, 00:07:51 »

Ah, shush, they're funny enough. The pool boy one and the text adventure ones I was proud of.

You should be ashamed of that last one.

YOU disconnected, it's always about getting the other person so frustrated THEY disconnect. In fact, you need to build up the crazy/trolling, start out small, and get them so mad they disconnect.
Logged
ASR
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 10911



« Reply #6 on: 5 April 2009, 00:16:29 »

Heh, fair enough. Though I was just having fun, not specifically trying to get them to disconnect.
Logged

Captain Sanoguchi
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 3211



« Reply #7 on: 5 April 2009, 06:08:05 »

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: i want to be, the very best...
You: Like no one ever was!
Stranger: to catch them is my real test...
You: To train them is my cause!
Stranger: i want to travel across the land
You: Searching far and wide!
Stranger: these pokemons don't understand
You: SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE ATER!
You: Got anything smart to say now?
Logged
preventerWIND
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 6423



« Reply #8 on: 5 April 2009, 06:15:51 »

This was my first.

You: Freeze sucka
Stranger: I'm not moving!
You: you're under arrest!
You: for being fine, awww yeah
Stranger: Should I spread my legs?
Stranger: awwww Yeuh!
You: while you do that, you have the right to remain silent
Stranger: How did you know I'm fine?
Stranger: I would so love to be molested by a cop
You: I can see through the internet
Stranger: there is no spoone - the matricks
You: the cops here are all ugly
Stranger: oh....
You: though they're pretty big - or so I hear
Stranger: where are you?
You: Canadia
Stranger: hummm
Stranger: Canadian cops sound hot
Stranger: I could get felt up my a mountie
You: mounties are rough
Stranger: i love rough men
You: I love men in general
You: one up'd you
Stranger: @.@
Stranger: got me
Stranger: are you a homosexual male?
You: I'm bi
Stranger: awesome
Stranger: bi men are the best
You: HAHAHA NOT YOU'RE GAY LOL
You have disconnected.

I also tried to go the same route as ASR. But-

You: rap battle
You: GO!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

:C
Logged

LOL BANDWAGON
ChaosVortex
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 5638



« Reply #9 on: 5 April 2009, 06:31:58 »

[Omegle chat]

I loved that.
Logged

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Johncarllos
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Posts: 6806



« Reply #10 on: 5 April 2009, 06:59:36 »

Omegle is fun, but I have trouble starting crazy convos.
Logged

I can skin anything smaller than a bobcat in 30 seconds.
Captain Sanoguchi
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 3211



« Reply #11 on: 5 April 2009, 07:29:47 »

Sano Vs. Suicide Man

Stranger: hey how are ya?
You: Decent.
You: You?
Stranger: cool cool
Stranger: im fine
Stranger: just trolling you know the usual.
You: Neat.
Stranger: you know it.
You: Yeah, I think I've been on here long enough that it's about time I start doing the same.
Stranger: so ehm you from the US?
You: Oh boy, are you another one of those annoying man-children who love to berate the US and claim it's a nazi regime?
Stranger: huh?
Stranger: hah
You: Nothing, nevermind.
Stranger: well no not really.
You: Good.
You: You win a gold star.
Stranger: well thank you.
Stranger: there are plenty of people on here that do that?
You: No, just two or so.
Stranger: ah
You: Well, that I've met.
Stranger: well have you heard of 4chan /b/?
You: But it seems everyone else is either a sped or a Brazilian pretending to know english.
You: You're breaking a rule!
Stranger: oh i know :)
Stranger: and thats the best part.
You: I guess so.
Stranger: and i am not a "sped" or "a Brazilian pretending to know english"
You: I gathered that.
Stranger: well i would only assume.
You: Feel free to do so from this point on.
Stranger: so im guessing you you arnt a "sped" or a Brazilian ether?
You: Last time I checked I am neither.
Stranger: and your sure of that?
You: Yes, I might be a spy though.
You: But I have to set myself on fire to check, and I don't feel like doing that at the moment.
Stranger: hmm. we may have to take care of that.
Stranger: going to an hero?
You: Nah, I got some sentries to sap first.
Stranger: then next?
You: Then I'll probably switch classes.
Stranger: i dont know..im pretty your going to die if you do.
You: Nah, if I go Heavy and get a Medic I'll be fine.
Stranger: and if the medic dies?
You: Well, it depends.
Stranger: say you got attacked from the left and the right and the medic was on the right while you were on the left?
You: That wouldn't happen, the Medic knows his place is always behind me.
Stranger: ok so
Stranger: then
Stranger: if you were teleported to the artic and the medic was killed and you found a way back to only find the medic dead?
You: I'd wait for a new one, and if I get hurt while waiting I'll just snack on my sanvich.
Stranger: mhmm. well sounds like you got it worked out.
You: I don't think the engineer's teleporters could go that far though anyway.
Stranger: but say over 9000 spys attacked you?
Stranger: then what?
You: It depends.
Stranger: on?
You: Are they crab spys?
Stranger: no squid spys
You: Do I have a dispenser near by?
Stranger: nope
Stranger: and they have ink pockets loaded and ready to fire.
You: That wouldn't happen.
Stranger: well...
You: Uh... 'Cuz...
Stranger: then what if it did but right as it did you woke up to a 1 bed room no bath apartment in iran?
Stranger: and you were an american social worker?
You: What objects are in the room?
Stranger: a tv, a twin bed, a desk with a laptop and wireless connecter, your clothes and a camera to take pictures for your family who had to your suprise just been killed by north korea's warheads.
You: Do the beds have sheets or blankets and how clean is the room?
Stranger: you room is about as clean as a 1975 downtown street of newyork in chinatown. and yes sheets on the bed.
You: Alright, I'd take the sheets off of both of the beds, I'd tie one around my body like a robe and the other around the top of my head like a turban. Then I'd barrel roll on the ground until the sheets were sufficiently dirty enough, then I'd realize this attempt at a disguise sucks and then I'd abort that plan.
Stranger: i see. and after you aborted the plan you hear a knock at the door with lots of voices yelling "jihad jihad" whats your next move?
You: I'd reply "Wrong room!"
Stranger: but they would noice your voice was different then a normal iranian's.
You: If they inquired I would yell that they were capitalistic infidels which would make them reconsider their initial assumption.
Stranger: yes yes, then you realized that a bomb was placed under your bed and it had 20 seconds on it. your next moves would be to try and disarm it, put it at the door and hide or jump threw the window and hope to live.
You: I'd grab the bomb, open the door, and then give it to the men or man at the door as a gift.
Stranger: what if right as you opened the door the man shot you right in the right lung?
You: I'd die.
You: But I'd still beat you.
Stranger: but see i forsaw everything that happened which means im god.
You: Because your goal was to make me find no other option than to kill myself.
Stranger: possibly.
You: I still won.
Stranger: but if you won which would make me win becuase my goal was for you to die but for you to still win
You: DAMMIT! HE GOT ME!
Stranger: BOOM HEADSHOT!
You: Boom... Headshot.
Stranger: if you find the omegle thread you should put this in there because i dont have fingers to copy paste this in there
Stranger: first blood!
You: Sorry I made you pay for lunch the other day.
Stranger: well its ok i have the money but some bully beats me up for it every day. id fight back but... i cant hes football team.
You: He is football team indeed.
You have disconnected.

Sano vs. The Language Barrier

Stranger: مرحبا
You: NO!!!
You have disconnected.

Sano (pretending to be a furry) Vs. Pervert

Stranger: Cyber?
You: Furries okay?
Stranger: Are you a chick?
You: No, a falcon actually.
You: You can be a squirrel.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Sano Vs. Panda Lover

Stranger: heya
You: You like candy?
Stranger: i like candy
Stranger: u like pandas?
You: No.
Stranger: :(
You have disconnected.

Sano's quest for a "Hell Yeah!"

Stranger: hello
You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
Stranger: ok? bye?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
Stranger: hell no
You: :(
You have disconnected.

You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
Stranger: YEAH
Stranger: tell me baby, what's your story
You: Where ya come from and where ya wanna go this time?
Stranger: oh, impressed!
Stranger: from?
You: Sorry, I have no time to impress you anymore. For I am on a quest for a HELL YEAH.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: i lose
You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
You: Oh... Wait... What?
Stranger: ##### you
You: No, ##### you.
Stranger: fuvk you buddy
You: I'm not your buddy, friend.
Stranger: i'm not your friend, guy
You: No... I'm not doing this.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: hey !
You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
Stranger: of course
You: . . .
You: :(
You have disconnected.

You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
Stranger: hi r u happy?
You: Not anymore.
You have disconnected.

You: CAN I GET A HELL YEAH!?
Stranger: HELL YEAH
You: Thank you.
You have disconnected.

Sano Vs. Nice People

Stranger: hey
You: I'm sad.
Stranger: why is that?
You: 'Cuz the girl I liked rejected me.
You: 4 years ago.
Stranger: damn brother
Stranger: you must be really into this girl
You: 4 years ago today.
Stranger: best I can say is let her go
You: It's the anniversary of the day she broke my heart and soul.
You: I can't.
Stranger: are you convinced she's your one and only?
Stranger: because if she doesn't feel the same way, then she isn't plain and simple
You: Wow, dude.
You: You're a nice person.
You: You actually are at least pretending to care about a complete stranger.
You: Good for you.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: Hey, do you know how to make women love you?
Stranger: be honestly
You: Wow, you just gave a complete stranger good advice.
You: Good job being an awesome person.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: hello
You: Should I kill myself?
Stranger: no
You: Good job!
You: You passed the nice person test.
Stranger: well it's just the way I look at it
You: Gold star for you!
You have disconnected.

Stranger: You: Cecily?
Stranger: 幹您娘咧 肏雞掰 我是王浩宇
You: Is it okay to like guys?
Stranger: Are you a male?
You: Yes.
Stranger: Has it always been or just recently
Stranger: Be honest
You: Well, for awhile actually.
Stranger: How old
You: Does it matter?
Stranger: A general age will do
You: young adultish.
Stranger: so around 19?
You: Somewhere around there.
Stranger: If you are unsure, there's support groups
You: Wow, dude.
You: Thanks for being socially tolerant and attempting to be helpful.
Stranger: Absolutely
Stranger: :)
You: I'm not really gay.
Stranger: Ah
You: I'm just testing people to see if they're nice or not.
You: You pass.
Stranger: Lol
You have disconnected.

Sano Vs. Defensive 16-Year-Old Girl

Stranger: hey
Stranger: if you're a guy. and just want sex. disconnect now.
You: Uh...
You: Wow...
Stranger: haha sorry.. thats all guys seem to want on this website.
You: You're pretty defensive, aren't you?
You: Nah.
You: I
Stranger: well no. im just wanting to talk to a normal. average. guy. not someone who wants to cyber.
You: I'm going to assume you're a girl then.
Stranger: haha yeah
Stranger: your a guy?
You: Alright, normal conversation, go ahead.
You: Yes, yes I am.
Stranger: haah cool.
how old are you, if you dont mine me asking Stranger.
You: Not old, not young.
Stranger: 20?
You: Around there.
Stranger: mroe or less?
You: Does it matter?
Stranger: i guess not.
Stranger: im 16.. incase you were wondering.
You: So, you wanted to have normal conversation?
Stranger: yeah.
Stranger: do you?
You: Sure.
You: What do 16-year-old girls talk about?
Stranger: do i have other choices?
i mean, other than a normal conversation.
Stranger: uhm, boys. nailpolish. pmsing. shavings legs. movies. stuff like that.
You: Ah.
You: Interesting. So how do boys make you feel?
You: I'm assuming you don't like most of them.
Stranger: depends on the boy.
Stranger: haha. well, if they like curves. i like them.
You: Ah.
You: So then how's nailpolish been lately?
Stranger: good. i lost my favorite one though :(
kinda makes me sad.
Stranger: it was like bright orange.
You: Ah.
You: An what's up with PMSing?
Stranger: oh you know. nothing really right now. probably something within the next weeek or so though. which im notttt looking forward to.
You: That's understandable.
You: So how about that leg shaving?
Stranger: i need to do that.
You: Ooookay, seen any good movies lately?
Stranger: yeah, i watched Toy Story tonight. what about you?
You: ...Toy Story made me lock up all my toys...
Stranger: erally?
You: Well, the first time I watched it the ending kind of frightened me.
Stranger: the christmas part?
You: No before that.
Stranger: oh.. uhm, the part where Woody and Buzz are in that bullys house?
You: Yeah, and when Woody's head starts spinning like the exorcist.
Stranger: OH< yeah. that part. it was slightly creepy.
You: 'Kay, movie talk is over!
Stranger: haha alright.
You: So, stuff?
You: Uh...
Stranger: i think im going to go..
Stranger: sorry. im tired
Stranger: and like, my eyes hurt.
You: Okay.
Stranger: yeah.. ttyl
Stranger: i liked our talk though.

Old Sano Vs. 32-year-old Douche

Stranger: Just getting this out of the way early, I have a #####
Stranger: Hi!
You: . . .
You: You should meet a girl I just talked with.
Stranger: ORLY?
You: She kind of started out just like that.
Stranger: With a #####?
You: No, she said vagina in the place of #####.
Stranger: Nice. A girl after my own heart
Stranger: Anyway, you're no fun
You: What's with you kids these days and starting off conversations by declaring what sort of genitalia you have?
Stranger: I'm no kid
You: Compared to me you probably are.
You: You got grankids?
Stranger: 32
Stranger: Nah
You: Then pipe down, sonny.
Stranger: Didn't realise it was a competition
You: It is when you're my age.
Stranger: Sounds like you're a whinging bitch to me
You: It's called 'See if you can live longer than all your relatives and friends.'
Stranger: "Oh, look at me, I'm really old, I must know more than everyone"
You: I didn't say I knew more than you.
Stranger: Jerk!
You: Have my brain is mush anyway.
You: Sorry, half.
Stranger: So, you like dogs?
You: I did.
You: I'm too old to keep 'em these days.
Stranger: Let me guess, you didn't get along because it was younger than you?
You: No, I didn't get along because it knocked me over and nearly killed me.
Stranger: Shame it didn't succeed
You: Indeed.
Stranger: You sound like a stubborn old #####
Stranger: I like that
You: The old ##### would be my wife.
Stranger: If I live past 42, that's how I'm going to end up
You: It's like a mummy's tomb down there, I swear.
Stranger: Sweet. Does your dick smell like dead flesh afterwards?
« Last Edit: 5 April 2009, 09:45:29 by Captain Sanoguchi » Logged
ASR
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 10911



« Reply #12 on: 5 April 2009, 11:31:38 »

Out of ALL of those, Sano...

Stranger: hello
You: Should I kill myself?
Stranger: no
You: Good job!
You: You passed the nice person test.
Stranger: well it's just the way I look at it
You: Gold star for you!
You have disconnected.

...this was the only one I liked. And only because the guy said "well it's just the way I look at it."

That was funny to me.
Logged

ChaosVortex
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 5638



« Reply #13 on: 5 April 2009, 14:41:44 »

I only liked "Sano Vs. Panda Lover" and "Quest for a Hell Yeah".

Everything else was either meh or unfunny. Especially your first one Sano. That was "tldr" material, and at the bottom I didn't laugh at all.
Logged

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Majikn
Super Robot
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Posts: 2354



« Reply #14 on: 5 April 2009, 17:04:17 »

I liked a lot of those.

And ASR, I laughed at that one for the same reason.
Logged

The Exorcist has taught me that when I'm losing an argument I may save face by vomiting on the opposition.
Captain Sanoguchi
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 3211



« Reply #15 on: 7 April 2009, 02:46:27 »

Sano teaches Headcrab safety.

Stranger: hey!
You: Hey.
Stranger: what's up?
You: Gas prices again.
Stranger: nice response, ha
You: My initial response was going to be headcrabs.
Stranger: haha that would have been better!
You: Well fine, headcrabs.
Stranger: OH DAMN
You: What's the first thing you should always do when dealing with headcrabs?
Stranger: no idea. i can't say i have had experience with headcrabs
You: You haven't taken any headcrab defence courses?
Stranger: no! i feel so unprepared oh my god
You: Thats right.
Stranger: well what do you do?!
You: So, here's what you should do when you see a headcrab.
Stranger: okay i'm ready.
You: First, look around and see if there are any objects such as a crowbar, a pipe wrench, or a led pipe.
You: If you have one of those near by it could be all you need.
Stranger: is that it?
You: Well, yes, all you have to do is beat it to death.
You: Just make sure it doesn't get onto the head of you or anyone around you.
You: If it does, you'll have to kill that person.
Stranger: that is very understandable.
You: You can do this by beating them with a blunt object, throwing sharp objects at them, setting them on fire, or shooting them.
You: Make sure to aim at the headcrab.
You: You're trying to kill it, not the person under it.
You: But, you can hit the person because it might result in the headcrabs death.
You: Either way it doesn't matter, 'cuz there's no way you'll be able to save your friend.
Stranger: wow stranger you are very knowledgeable!
You: Yup.
You: But it's advised to kill the headcrab on top.
You: This will also result in the death of the person it's on.
You: But killing the person it's on might not kill the headcrab.
You: The headcrab might try and run away.
Stranger: #####. this is risky
You: So then you really should kill it.
You: Now, it's different if the headcrab is on a regular person's head or a post-human's head.
Stranger: oh really?
You: For instance, say the headcrab is on a post-human civil protection unit's head.
You: It'll probably pull out a grenade.
Stranger: ##### ##### #####!
You: If you can, you should try and take the grenade from it and then throw it at it.
Stranger: i don't think i'll be able to...
Stranger: IT'S COMING RIGHT AT ME!
Stranger: AAAH
Stranger: OH SHI-
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Logged
ChaosVortex
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 5638



« Reply #16 on: 7 April 2009, 05:04:15 »

AH GREAT. Sano's got a new toy.

Look ASR. Sano's got a new toy.

You started this. This is all your fault.

I hope you're happy.
Logged

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Lunchebox
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 1235



« Reply #17 on: 7 April 2009, 06:12:12 »

I thought we all agreed not to show Sano something he could have FUN with?
Logged
Mikero
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 11982



« Reply #18 on: 7 April 2009, 06:33:37 »

The Arctic Adventurer's Adventure in The Arctic Circle with his Circle of Friends who are also Arctic themed and in The Arctic with him, The Arctic Adventurer.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: I tell youto ##### off and die
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: Nothing.
You: Too late. Your ##### has frozen and fallen off, any life beyond this point isn't worth living anyway.
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: NW?
Stranger: OH CRAP.
Stranger: I DON'T KNOW.
Stranger: QUICK. THINK OF SOMETHING.
You: You are beginning to freeze.
You: What do you do?
Stranger: ##### ##### #####.
Stranger: Eat an orange?
Stranger: NO THAT'S WRONG.
You: You ##### all over the floor.
Stranger: OH NOES.
You: That keeps you warm for a bit.
Stranger: WHAT CUSS CAN I USE?
You: Then you bite into the first mandarin orange and break all your teeth on it's frozen rind. Thinking that you know have shark-like teeth (although I don't know why you would think that) you bite again, thoroughly breaking your jaw. You are bleeding out of your mouth hole. What do you do?
Stranger: ##### THE FARMER'S WIFE AND HOPE THAT HELL IS WARMER.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Ohaidare :D
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
You: It is very cold and frost bite is beginning to set in.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: Panic at the Disco boardie?
Stranger: eat everything in sight
You: You panic at the disco. However the disco is nowhere in sight and is probably just a hallucination.
You: You bite into the first mandarin orange and break all your teeth on it's frozen rind. Thinking that you know have shark-like teeth (although I don't know why you would think that) you bite again, thoroughly breaking your jaw. You are bleeding out of your mouth hole. What do you do?
Stranger: ask the farmers wife to knock me out with the legth of pipe so i can die a painless death
You: The farmers wife responds by chewing her cud.
You: She is of no real help to anyone at this point...
Stranger: where did she get cud? i want some.
You: You search the farmer's wife and find cud in her mouth.
Stranger: knock myself out with the pipe?
You: You grab the pipe. You are now attached (frozen) to the length of pipe.
Stranger: WHY AM I IN THE ARCTIC?!?! xD
You: You attempt to bash yourself in the head with the pipe. Your head is now attached to pipe.
Stranger: AHAHAHAHAHA
Stranger: kick the penguin
You: You wonder why you are in the arctic out loud. No response but you get the feeling that Barney the archmage has something to do with it, as he has hated you for years ever since boarding school.
Stranger: i still want to kick the penguin.
You: You attempt to kick the penguin. The penguin is actually a chupacabra using a mystic glamour obtained in 1232 by Amelia Airhart's band of time travelling pilots and passed onto to the chupacabra when it ate Amelia in the distant future of the year 2000. The penguin shows it's true nature before you and you soil yourself before being devoured. But whatever, you should have known. Penguins live in antarctica.
You: I'm sorry, you have died.
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: you win at life
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: I love you
You: You love me, and as such get much warmer and survive. You have won the challenge.
You: Congradulations!
Stranger: Yay!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: I realize that penguins don't live in the arctic and hit the woman, who is undoubtedly conspiring against me with the farmer and the penguin, with the pipe.
You: You are now attached (frozen) to the length of pipe. The farmer married a goat. The farmer's wife is a goat. You have killed the goat and now have a dead goat and 37 mandarin oranges.
You: While it is true penguins live in antarctica, this one continues to slowly approach.
Stranger: I drink some warm warm goat's blood and go towards the penguin, but past it, following the tracks it left in the snow.
Stranger: It had to come from somewhere where they would have the means to keep a penguin alive in the arctic
You: Leaving the penguin alone was a good idea, as it is actually chupacabra using a mystic glamour obtained in 1232 by Amelia Airhart's band of time travelling pilots and passed onto to the chupacabra when it ate Amelia in the distant future of the year 2000. It doesn't show you it's true nature however, as you have ignored it. You follow it's tracks back to a small cave.
You: There is a torch by the cave's entrance, as it is dark inside. What do you do?
Stranger: I wake up as a 12 year old boy who was in a coma for 3 months due to a little league related injury. My parents are ecstatic. My mom hugs me and my dad asks if I want to go fishing tomorrow. I say yes.
You: You go fishing tomorrow. On the way a cloverfield monster attacks your boat. Your father fights it with a trident but is swallowed whole while killing it. The monster is dead with it's mouth open, there is a chance your father is alive. What do you do?
Stranger: I let him soak in its digestive juices. He deserves to suffer after making me sign up for little league when all I really wanted to do was join chess club. I row the boat to shore and pretend to be shocked that my father is dead. Really I am going to enjoy the money his life insurance provides my household. This is an economic crisis. Someone needs to get laid off, and it ain't me. I wanna go to med school.
You: You go to attempt your MSATs at the age of 13. You want to be Neil Patrick Harris. However, you have forgotten a number 2 pencil. What do you do?
Stranger: I ask the testing director if they have a spare pencil
You: The testing director offers you his pencil. It is a regulation number 2 pencil and perfectly useable except ew gross yuck barf it has all sorts of bite marks all over it and the testing directed looks like he might have the oral herpes virus. You feel alright in diagnosing this since you're already PRACTICALLY a doctor, right? Right. What do you do?
Stranger: I, unconcerned with anything other than being an MD, deal with it. I can always cure herpes later.
You: You use the pencil and don't get herpes anyway. Maybe a bit of hep C, but not herpes so whatever. I'm not gonna lie, no one has gotten past the penguin before, so I'll just let you decide if you pass the MSATs.
Stranger: I can achieve anything I want. And I want to pass the MSATs, so I do.
You: You pass the MSATs and are now the youngest doctor ON THE PLANET MARS.
You: Ooo weee ooo Twilight Zone.
Stranger: I eat astronaut ice cream and I am currently writing a manual on what to do if you are injured while climbing Olympus Mons.
Stranger: I also have AIDS from sleeping with too many three boobed hookers from total recall. But its Space AIDS, so it makes me stronger.
You: The astronaut ice cream is delicious, but not SO delicious that it should really be called "astronaut ice cream". It's really just OK ice cream and you expected more from Space Ben and Space Jerry. This is driving you mad, as evidenced in your manual which has become somewhat of a dispassionate journal. Your handwriting is degrading into chicken scratch and you are becoming more paranoid. That said, you could really go for another 3 boobed hooker (but who couldn't, am I right? Am I right?)
You: Congradulations, you have just become Alan Moore and have won the game.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: You are stuck in the arctic with the farmer's wife, 37 mandarin oranges, and a length of pipe. A lone penguin slowly approaches. What do you do?
Stranger: I AM a penguin
Stranger: Don't be such a prude
You: Fair enough.
Stranger: I would eat some oranges, I suppose.
Stranger: And say to the other penguin:
You: You are a penguin. You see a man, the farmer's wife, a length of pipe and 37 oranges. What do you do?
Stranger: "I like yo face"
Stranger: I eat them all
Stranger: This is penguin's Earth now.
Stranger: *penguin lurch*
You: You have devoured them all. You are now the king of Atlantis somehow.
Stranger: Fair enough.
Stranger: You are my penguin advisor.
Stranger: What do you do?
You: I advise you, penguin master.
You: You just said so.
You: And you are king.
Stranger: What do we do about Sarah Palin?
You: So I can't say any different.
Stranger: *penguin squawk*
You: We do whatever we want about Sarah Palin. Muah muahahahaha
Stranger: MUAHAHAHHA
m
Stranger: MUAHAHAHA
You: MUAHAHAAHAHAAAAAAAA
You: Oh we have fun.
Stranger: *pushes you down the stair case, and replaces you*
Stranger: I am sorry, friend.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Logged

Vinchenz Rock
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 3642



« Reply #19 on: 7 April 2009, 08:41:22 »

The second last one was PRICELESS.

God, it was so hilarious.
Logged

Johncarllos
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 6806



« Reply #20 on: 7 April 2009, 17:47:23 »

The second TO last one was PRICELESS.

God, it was so hilarious.

Mike, you are an omegle champ.
Logged

I can skin anything smaller than a bobcat in 30 seconds.
ASR
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 10911



« Reply #21 on: 7 April 2009, 17:53:33 »

Fantastic. At first I was annoyed that you were copy/pasting lines but I got over that because it was still entertaining.
Logged

Mikero
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 11982



« Reply #22 on: 7 April 2009, 22:27:01 »

I only had the start and small plans for the main answers I thought would come up. I'm surprised no one said they'd ##### the farmer's wife (at least in time for me to reply). The only reason I did that was because I figured taking too long to reply would make the other person leave.

The second last one was PRICELESS.

God, it was so hilarious.

Good because that damn guy/gal took #####ing forever to reply to anything and I was real tired of it.
Logged

Captain Sanoguchi
Super Robot
*****
Posts: 3211



« Reply #23 on: 7 April 2009, 23:37:00 »

I thought we all agreed not to show Sano something he could have FUN with?

Actually it's gotten pretty stale.
Trying to troll people trolling you doesn't work too well.
Logged
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The MBoard  |  Non-MegaMan  |  Any Other Business?  |  : Omegle - chat with a stranger anonymously
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