No More Heroes

[Captain Sanoguchi]

I mean who cares about French Manuals anyway?

Quebec and Snare?

Haven't played since killing the third boss, but I'll pick it up again soon.

How'dya kill Shinobu? Lawl!

[ASR]

True, but I'm trying not to spoil anything, moron. Once again, you fail horrendously.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

Not really much of a spoiler.

[ASR]

It's still a spoiler, asshat.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

Not enough of one to actually ruin the game's story.

[ASR]

OMG U RUINED IT YYYYY?!!!!

[Captain Sanoguchi]

Gee, it sure is bloody around here.
These might be considered as spoilers to some. Yeah, just some comparisons between the censored and the uncensored version.

10
9
8
7
6

Yeeeah, who knew Suda 51 could turn European men into retarded, 4 year old girls.

See?

Posted on:  2 February 2008, 23:28:02

Oh yeah, here's something that isn't in the American version of NMH, I think it's only in the Japanese version, but I don't know. In the American version in its' place is the first NMH trailer. I actually like the original trailer more than this, so yay America.

Heavenly Star

You might recognize the song from like every store in Santa Destroy.

Posted on:  3 February 2008, 21:40:44

You know how I said America was awesome because we got the blood version? Well, Japan got something we didn't, other than Heavenly Star.
They got a manual that's actually interesting. Anyone who has the game should notice how the North American manual is black and white and boring. Well, the Japanese get a fairly interesting Manga for an instruction manual.

Some translated scans...

Cover
Page 1
Page 2

That's all I could find. I know it's not great, but it's better than our black and white sleep inducing manual.
Yeah, I'm starting to lose interest in NMH, I never thought I would, it's just too awesome. But, I've beaten everything and it seems you get nothing for beating everything, but I'm still going to look for a few more days. I can't give up on GrassHopperMan.

[Johncarllos]

Those scans are coooolio.
I'm probably going to trade this in when I get Brawl, lest one of you folks wants to buy it.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

If you don't keep NMH for the rest of your life you'll make Suda 51 cry. I mean dude, don't toss something away just because you've used it once and are bored with it. Keep it, and enjoy it again in the future.

[ASR]

A lot of people are low on cash.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

Yeah, didn't you learn anything from Travis?

Strange jobs = Money
Killing people = More money

It's the same way in real life.

[ASR]

Not really.

[NovaMan XP]

Possibly, but don't forget you actually get arrested for doing that in real life...

[Captain Sanoguchi]

Well I did notice Santa Destroy doesn't have a police station.

[ASR]

There were police cars, though.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

Oh yeah.

[ASR]

We can just assume that they use the backseat as a makeshift prison cell.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

'Kay. Now for something for those who couldn't hear Travis' monologue during the battle with DeathMetal.

This count... I feel as if I'm looking at my future self.
Mega bucks, big ass house, fast cars...
Dinning in style with a world class chef and a trusty nutritionist counting every calorie.
A team of hot yoga instructors to keep me in shape.
Nurses to attend to my body.
Maids and loyal servants at my beck and call.
On the weekends, tanned babes knocking on my door every two hours.
Everyday full of excitement and luxury.
That'd be the life.
Everything in its right place.
It's the perfect life.
It's the life of winners.
That'll be my life.
I thirst for selflessness.
Hypocrites lusting for their own desires get killed by young rookies like me.
This is how it goes down.
And for the old killers, they'll croak anyway.
I guess you can call this a comedy.
I realize there's really nothing here for me.
But what else can I do but keep going?
Maybe I should have been a little more careful before I jumped in.
Gotta find the exit.
Gotta find that exit to paradise.
But, I can't see it.
I can't see anything.
There's this sense of doom running down my spine like it's...
Like it's trying to suck the life out of me.
I need to get rid of it before I bail.
Something deeper...
Deeper than my instincts is taunting me.
Can't find the exit.
Can't find the exit.
Can't find the exit.
Can't find the exit.
Can't find the ext.

Suda sure can write 'em.

[The Otaku]

I'm looking forward to NMH. After reading stories and posts about it, I've concluded it's a lot like GTA. Now all I have to do is hope the guys at the White House won't make the same conclusion as I have and get on NMH's back.

[Majikn]

Yeah, thanks Sano. I was too focused on not dying to figure out what the hell he was saying.

[Mikero]

The White House is far too busy to handle video game issues...

[The Otaku]

The White House is far too busy to handle video game issues...

Yet the politics up there found the time to argue with GTA developers about the X-rated hidden content.

[Mikero]

That wasn't really "The White House".

[The Otaku]

Sorry, I can't tell the difference between the white guys at the White House and the other ones.

[Mikero]

All White people look the same anyway.

[The Otaku]

Which is exactly why I couldn't tell the difference.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

I'm looking forward to NMH. After reading stories and posts about it, I've concluded it's a lot like GTA. Now all I have to do is hope the guys at the White House won't make the same conclusion as I have and get on NMH's back.

There are so many things that are dumb about your post.

[preventerWIND]

Idiot.

[NovaMan XP]

No mre hoes.

WHAT?! MADNESS!

[Vinchenz Rock]

MADNESS!?

THIS.

IS.

SANTA DESTROY!

[Captain Sanoguchi]

You're all just soooooo clever.

[Kayauts]

I really want to get this game, but I'm not really sure how to go about getting the uncensored version.

[ASR]

There's a censored version?

[Johncarllos]

Yeah, Europe and Japan got the gore-less version.

[ChaosVortex]

If you ever saw the video Sano (or maybe it was WIND) posted, some kid was complaining about it, defining the blood and gore being replaced by "pixie-dust".

Posted on:  6 April 2008, 04:26:48

Wait a minute. He's in Oregon right? He shouldn't have a problem getting it then.

[ASR]

I remember watching that.

[Captain Sanoguchi]

If you ever saw the video Sano (or maybe it was WIND) posted, some kid was complaining about it, defining the blood and gore being replaced by "pixie-dust".

The Video

It's a grown man, but he's just a little bitch who needs to shut the ##### up.
##### headed men children like this guy are why Suda released a censored version for Europe.