The record for amount of beatings in one day is 23 times.
Masturbation, yes.
Posted on: 14 February 2008, 03:45:54
SNAKE'S CODECS TRANSLATED:[spoiler]
Luigi:
Snake: That mustache...
Colonel: The number 2 of forever. (hahaha)
Snake: Hey, hey, we're talking about Luigi here!
Colonel: The so-called social outcast.
Snake: You don't have to have to put him down like that!
Colonel: You're soft Snake! There's no such thing as a little brother that is superior to his big brother!
Snake: What, what's wrong? Colonel?
Colonel: LaLiLuLeLo! LaLiLuLeLo! LaLiLuLeLo!
Snake: Colonel! Snap out of it! Colonel! Colonel!!!! (in a clear reference to when snake dies in the games)
Donkey Kong
Snake: Otacon, there's a gorilla wearing a necktie. It's huge.
Otacon: That's Donkey Kong. As you can see, he is a powerful one. He rules over the jungle, but he also has a really nice house. He has brains like that. The one who fought with Mario was actually his grandfather.
Snake: Well, that was then. Is he on good terms with Mario now?
Otacon: Not really, they compete a lot in kart racing and sports matches.
Snake: Not fighting with blood huh? (not sure about this one, it's a Japanese saying probably)
Samus:
Snake: Otacon, there seems to be a woman in a Power Suit...
Otacon: What? How did you figure out she's a girl? She's the Space Hunter, Samus Aran. A bounty hunter who travels through the galaxy. Be careful with her arm cannon. A max charge shot will hurt pretty badly.
Snake: This may be a challenge.
Otacon: She definitely won't be anything easy at all. Losing her parents to Space Pirates, she was raised by the Chozo, and learned their battle techniques. She's most likely lived a life far from our imagination. And that probably won't change in the future.
Snake: A woman covered with a cold demeanor...
Link:
Snake: Otacon, who is that swordsman?
Otacon: Link. He is the hero of Hyrule. That Master Sword he is carrying is also known as the Blade of Evil's Bane. Shield, boomerang, bombs, arrows, hookshot, he's a got quite an arsenal. It'd be wise to be cautious.
Snake: Weapons should be prepared based on the situation. I don't think just carrying a bunch of random weapons is exactly the best strategy.
Otacon: Um... Mind my manners please, but Snake?
Snake: What is it?
Otacon: Doesn't... the same go for you?
Pikachu:
Mei-Ling: Oh, kawaii!!
Snake: Oh, you mean that yellow guy over there?
Mei-Ling: That's Pikachu, a world renowned Pokemon. It may look cute, but be careful. His cheeks store high voltages of electricity. Its many electrical attacks will be tough to bear.
Snake: Well, I don't think it'll beat Ocelot's cruel questionings.
Mei-Ling: By the way, Snake?
Snake: What is it?
Mei-Ling: If possible, I want you to catch Pikachu.... can you do it?
Snake: Give me a break. I'm no Pokemon Trainer.
Mei-Ling: Hmph... Be that way.
Fox:
Snake: That's one fast fox!
Colonel: You're fighting Fox, I believe. You seem to be having some trouble there... The mercenary band Star Fox's leader, Fox McCloud. He travels around the Lylat System with the Special Fighter Ship "Arwing"; his fighting capabilities can even change the tide of flow in wars. ...You really have a thing with Foxes, don't you, Snake?
Snake: Enough about that. I've had enough of FOXes and FOXHOUNDs.
Colonel: Cheer up. In many ways, it's a long relationship
Bowser:
Colonel: Be careful Snake! King Koopa is there!
Snake: Koopa? That thing that looks like a kaiju (giant movie monster)?
Colonel: He's the leader of the Koopa army. Watch out for his strong arms and fire breath.
Snake: But he looks kinda slow. So he actually isn't weak?
Colonel: Since he is king of the Koopas, there is no doubt he is thickheaded. But on the other hand, he is heavier than any other fighter. So of course he has great destructive power. Watch out so you don't get crushed.
Ness:
Colonel: That young boy is Ness.
Snake: Ness?
Colonel: Although he's a young boy, Ness is a master at PSI.
Snake: You mean, like Psycho Mantis ?
Colonel: Yes, teleportation, telekinesis, levitation, psychokinesis (something)
Snake: Oh, so does that mean I have to change the controller port?
Kirby:
Otacon: Be careful, Snake!
Snake: What, you mean that round guy over there?
Otacon: That's Kirby. Also known as Kirby of the Stars. He's an alien from a distant planet. His endless stomach eats just about anything, and digests them without mercy. And by copying his prey's ability, then attacks the enemy's unsuspecting allies with his camoflouge to continue his feast. Also add his ability to fly. There won't be any way to get away from him once he has a lock on you. How horrifying...
Snake: Okaaaaay... right. Well, I'll be careful when fighting him.
Jigglypuff:
Snake: Theres something with large eyes walking around.
Colonel: That's Purin. (Jigglypuff's Japanese name)
Snake: Purin? Isn't that a dessert? (Purin/pudding... I guess they're closer in Japanese.)
Colonel: Purin is a balloon Pokemon. It's filled with air that makes you drowsy. So it has the power to make you sleep.
Snake: Sleep? But I guess this is no ordinary sleep.
Colonel: Although it's a brief nap, if you are near it a staggering energy reaction will happen. If you take that it will be an instant KO.
Snake: So it's at her best while sleeping? This thing is over the top.
Colonel: It's a big world, especially in Super Smash.
Falco:
Snake: This is Snake...
Slippy: You called, Snake? This is Slippy!
Snake: What the...Who is this frog-like guy?
Slippy: Heh, I went through the trouble to say hello to you with some valuable info, and that's the reply I get?
Snake: Blatantly hacking into our system, huh....
Slippy: Don't worry, I won't break anything.
Snake: ...
Slippy: Falco, just like Fox, is equipped with the blaster and reflectors I invented. But Falco uses the reflector by kicking it. I guess he's trying to show off with it.
Snake: ...there should be no problem in using weapons in multiple ways. Your weapons being used in many ways... wouldn't that prove how well made they are?
Slippy: I guess so. I feel better now! Thanks Snake!
Snake: I'd like to have one of your weapons the next time you've invented a new one.
Ganondorf:
Snake: What's this thirst for blood I feel from this giant!? I can feel my skin tremble just by getting close.
Otacon: Snake! Ganondorf is dangerous! He plans to control the world, and he has the power to do it! His name of King of Evil is definitely fitting.
Snake: With him as an enemy, can modern weapons even beat him?
Otacon: Look at everyone else. They're fighting with swords and bare hands. You have guns, isn't that good enough? Spouting complaints isn't like you, Snake.
Snake: Just thought I'd ask. I'll do my duty.
ROB:
Otacon: It looks like you're fighting Robot, Snake.
Snake: There are lots of things called Robot. Isn't there something better to call him?
Otacon: In America it's called ROB. So I guess that's what we can call it.
Snake: Yeah.
Otacon: In Japan, Robot had a white body and red arms which were called the Famicom colors. But foreign Famicoms were gray, so ROB became all gray.
Snake: It's no surprise you know these kinds of things pretty well, Otacon.
Otacon: Yeah.
Mr. G&W:
Snake: IT'S FLAT!! A FLAT MAN'S WALKING!!
Otacon: That's Mr. Game and Watch, an inhabitant of Flat Zone. The G&W is a handheld system that Nintendo released in 1980; it was an LCD game that shows the characters the way calculators do. That character from it is the Mr. Game&Watch you see in front of you.
Snake: What an odd opponent. Can you explain to me in an easy way to understand what sort of creature he is?
Otacon: Uh... well, you might grasp something by fighting him.
Diddy Kong:
Snake: Otacon, there's a chimpanzee wearing a Nintendo hat.
Otacon: That's Diddy Kong. Donkey Kong's sidekick. He's not just swift, he carries several weapons too. He flies with the Barrel Jet on his back, and fires nutshells with his peanut popgun.
Snake: Nutshells, as in the ones that hold peanuts?
Otacon: Yes, and it's not just that. When a shell explodes, sometimes a peanut pops out. Eating one of these would heal your stamina.
Snake: Wow... An edible bullet. Times have changed.
Olimar:
Mei Ling: Snake, have you heard of Zhen Zhong Ji's "Brief Dream of Prosperity?"
Snake: Nope, I haven't.
M: (some proverb) Although Olimar brings a lot of Pikmin, they quickly die. It's often through transporting, fighting, and being eaten. Olimar can increase the number of colleagues, but if you pay attention, he's quickly alone. It's kind of sad.
S: But can't he just pluck some more?
M: Well, I guess so.
S: There's no such thing as a person who fights alone. I don't.
M: Good luck Snake. I'm here to help.
Sonic:
Snake: ...Grr...
Otacon: What's wrong, Snake?
Snake :Somehow, I can't like this hedgehog...
Otacon: Hm? Oh, you mean Sonic the Hedgehog. He's a big star everyone knows. For a long time, everyone wanted him as a fighter for the brawl.
Snake: I know that, but I still don't like this guy being here.
Otacon: Why's that? Is there a reason why he shouldn't be?
Snake: ...No, I don't know why.
(Sonic's is actually a joke because hedgehogs eat snakes in real life)
Snake
Snake: Colonel! It can't be!
Colonel: What is it, Snake?
Snake: Seems like there's yet another clone of Big Boss. And he's made it into the game!
Colonel: Calm down Snake, that's not another clone. It seems you're fighting someone else who's also picked your character with a different color scheme.
Snake: What!? How's that possible!? He can't be me! I'm me!
Colonel: It's a game Snake. If Masahiro Sakurai says so, then it can.
Captain Falcon
Snake: "Whoa! That's Captain Falcon, isn't it?"
Otacon: "You know your facts well! He's an F-Zero Pilot. He's racer number 7!"
Snake: "Whenever you talk about Captain Falcon, we can't forget "that". I've always wanted to do "that" once."
Otacon: "Oh, "that"! Alright! Let's give it a try!!"
Snake: "FALCON PUUNCH!!"
Otacon: "FALCON KIICKK!!"
Toon Link
Snake: "Mei-Ling, who is that guy with the cat eyes?"
Mei-Ling: "He goes by Toon Link. We've seen him somewhere before, right?"
Snake: "Yeah, he's like Link."
Mei-Ling: "Even though you just say "Link", there are many other people who've used that name. Although there are many similarities, they lived in different eras. Branching time, passing through history, the hero of the Triforce that risks his life for Hyrule."
Snake: "That reminds me of another guy..."
Mei-Ling: "Huh? Who do you mean?"
Wolf:
S:Colonel, there's a guy who looks like a wolf...
C:That is "Wolf"!
S:There's no twist to the name, huh?
C:The leader of the rulfian unit "Starwolf," he is an old enemy of "Starfox".
S:Though he is a wolf, did he go with a comerade?
C:It seems like group action is a weak point. He is remarkably skilled as a pilot. The combat group he operates, "Wolfen" is quite stron.
S:This time it's a physical battle, I must not underestimate his strength.
C:Be careful not to get torn up by his sharp claws, Snake.[/spoiler]
Some of them are pretty funny. Some are missing, and some others are on the Dojo site, like Mario's, Yoshi's, Wario's, etc.
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